WHERE DO I FIT IN?
My dream is to live in Italy, it's always been, and always will be. When I applied to the Middlebury graduate program, I was single and focusing on advancing my teaching career, then I met my boyfriend and we fell in love. Being with me was "as easy as breathing" he said, and I felt the same. Adults with past loves, we felt we had found what we wanted in an ideal partner and planned our future; he waited for me to return from study abroad, and I agreed to move in together. I did not want to leave Italy, but I adored him and felt safe with him, so I came home as promised. Along with him came two teenagers and the un-housebroken dog on the weekends. It was a challenge to adjust; I wasn't used to living with other's messes or surprise dog-droppings in my occupancy. My boyfriend was busy with his demanding career, and I cautiously searched for my place in his house, his life and his family. I asked for a few adjustments in "our" home, justifiably: dog-training and some tidiness, but my requests were received with resentment - the dynamics were not to be changed. I felt lonely, isolated and confused; had I experienced a switch and bait? I was navigating several changes: the loss of my dad, leaving Italy, moving, job-hunting and my new roommates. Graduating from a "Little Ivy" college, I thought I'd be starting a stable life with my supportive, loving boyfriend and have a fascinating career. Instead, I was brimming with loneliness and loss.