I woke up in the post-op room surrounded by my friends, carrying flowers, fashion magazines and chocolate, and my relieved mother. Dr. Ross Cooperman, my plastic surgeon was happy to say that the surgery went well and that there was no sign of cancerous cells in the breast tissue or in the six lymph nodes Dr. Michele Blackwood removed. Success! My boyfriend took me for a walk and I vomited. I was taken to my room and with the help of narcotics, slept through the night. We hired a woman to stay with me overnight in case I needed anything, and in fact she was a great help when I needed to get up to go to the bathroom or reposition myself. The following day, Dr. Cooperman was not as happy with the results of the surgery; he noticed black skin, or necrosis, along the suture line of my left breast. Due to this, I was not go home that day, but stay the weekend and have more surgery on Monday to remove the dead skin. He was afraid that there wouldn't be enough skin to keep the expander in place, which meant my eventual reconstruction would involve taking fat and muscle tissue from my back to fill my breasts. I've heard in enough cancer support groups that this surgery was painful in many ways, I was worried and scared. Dr. Cooperman had warned me that neoadjuvant chemotherapy and smoking were two risk factors I faced against necrosis, and I sunk in shame, knowing I had to find another outlet for my main stressor: my home life.